Something strange is happening to me. I think I might be becoming Spiderman. For starters, I've been developing an extraordinarily strange rash on my upper body. It suddenly appeared last night like a tsunami of red spots. But they're barely noticeable even at close distance because each spot is so fine and so small. The rash is also annoyingly fickle. It can appear and disappear within hours. At least it doesn't itch at all. Now it's sort of like a faint pink constellation across my very confused skin. Also, my temperature has been hovering at some ridiculously foreign temperature of 37.2 degrees. Honestly, what is 37.2 degrees? Has anyone ever had that before? I don't feel particularly hot, but definitely more than I do feel cold - clearly not a feverish symptom.
Most interestingly, I have what seems to be a steadily improving insect bite on my left wrist. It's bigger than the typical mosquito bite, but about as large as the average pinky nail would grow to become before you decide to trim it. It has a wrinkled, stubby scab sitting on top of it as if it were wearing a maroon turban of some sort. Otherwise, there's absolutely no pain and no itch, like the rash. Or maybe it's actually part of the rash, I don't know.
Sadly, no superhuman capabilities have manifested themselves as of now. It is quite disappointing. I know I used to dream about being Spiderman a lot not too long ago. Like literally dream about it at night, not in the sense of having actual aspirations. But then again the movies about him always have struck me about the same thing. I mean, with all that web coming out of his body can you imagine how much protein he would have to consume in one day?
Perhaps the last thing to grouse about is that if indeed I were to become some sort of superhero suddenly, the transformation would have come a little too late. As it appears on my clock, I've got two hours of Halloween left. Of course one possibility is that the superhero I turn into is Superman, which will enable me to turn back time by simply flying around the earth. But not a chance I suppose. As of now I think I still look very much like the same bloke when I wear my glasses. Shame.